PSSST! Wanna buy a video. This one’s got the lot – nudity, famous faces, white rap and even a ferret. It’s yours for £26million ono.
On Monday, the story was that the divorce of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline was getting dirty – just how dirty may one day be revealed on the video of K-Ferret and his wife engaging in “sex acts”.
The Star had heard that K-Ferret had been offered £26million for just such a tape. Why the rapping ferret would film his wife cavorting about the place naked when he can see her in the flesh every day or watch one of her sticky-fingered music videos is a moot point.
Perhaps K-Ferret saw a video as his insurance policy, a bartering tool to wield should his marriage fail and his version of Roland Rat’s Rat Rap not make him an international megastar.
Of course if Kevin really wasn’t to make it big, all he need do it head for the Blighty. “COME TO BRITAIN AND GET RICH,” advertised the front page of Tuesday’s Express.
On the face of it, this was no little change of direction for the paper that has been warning of Rogarians at the gates for some time now.
Of course, telling Bulgarians and Romanians that the UK is a land paved in the finest oak-style laminate and gilded in gold-plated Argos jewelry might be a cunning ploy. Build up the expectations and when the immigrant sees the grimy streets and grey complexions, the Rogarian will be on the first lorry back home.
That was the impression. The truth was somewhat different as the Express introduced its reader to a guide that tells Bulgarians how to get rich working here illegally.
While Britishers eagerly await the guide’s English translation, all eyes were gawking at another foreigner in our midst.
There is an entire cottage industry given over to gawping at Michael Jackson’s face. The Mail was ogling the scarring caused by numerous cosmetic operations on his nose”, deep “craters” on either ...read The Week on Anorak
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